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Toon Army Dispatches: Newcastle United 1, Fulham 0

Your one-stop shop for all things Newcastle - Fulham. Videos, GIFs, photos, tweets, quotes, stats, match ratings, and the new table.

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Celebrates with fans. Checks pockets after.
Celebrates with fans. Checks pockets after.
Chris Brunskill

Welcome to Toon Army Dispatches. This is a new-old feature at CHN; you may remember it in some form as The Post Game. Our aim with these posts is to be a one-stop shop for everything you could possibly want to review following a Newcastle match. This week's edition includes videos, GIFs, photos, tweets, quotes, stats, match ratings, and a look at the new table. The form is fluid; if there's something you want to see, let us know in the comment section. Enjoy!



Goal + celebrations [via]


The goal, via


The celebration (source unknown):


This week's photo gallery


Several players and ex-players followed along via Twitter.

Not everybody was concerned about the match, however. Important things were happening on the internet.


Alan Pardew

On the win and the week leading up to it:

It's been a tough week for us. We played really well against Benfica but came back with a result we would rather not have had. Then, playing against real quality opposition today, we have had to pull on everything to try to get a win. In the second half we played with a lot more composure, which was missing in the first half, probably because we were tired or nervous. But we deserved the goal, even though it came very, very late. I'm overjoyed for the players, they have worked really, really hard today. The emotions at the end from Papiss and myself were because of the relief from all that. [Sky Sports]

On Papiss Cisse's goal:

It was a big moment, no doubt about that. As someone who has been in the game a while and knows the financial implications, what it means to spirit, the feeling for the fans, the implications of everything involved, it's a precious goal. You can't put a price on it, you really can't. I can't underline how important the win is, with the extra two points. They are very, very important. [Yahoo! Eurosport]

On his celebration:

It was sheer relief. I was carrying all the stress of how important the game was, so it was nice to jump in the crowd. I didn't do it intentionally, it was a moment that came into my head at the time. It's difficult when you do something like that. I've had a couple of occasions in the past where I've jumped in the crowd. It's just a natural thing I wanted to do at that time with the fans. It was for them really as it's not been our greatest season. I did check my pockets after in case one of them wasn't a Newcastle fan, but fortunately my money was still there. [Yahoo Eurosport]

On showing Cisse a video at halftime of the pass he should have made to Sylvain Marveaux:

It’s ironic, because at half-time I showed Papiss a clip of a great chance when he should have passed to ­Sylvain Marveaux for a tap in. To be honest, his reaction was very negative, but then he pops up at the end with a fantastic goal. [The Telegraph]


I don't usually do that. Papiss reacted negatively. He was depressed and unhappy with himself. I wondered if I'd done the wrong thing. But then he showed his composure. Berbatov was the only other player on the pitch who could have done that. [The Guardian]

On the relegation battle:

I inherited that West Ham team in the Championship [in 2003] that had gone down on 42 points. You can't underestimate this year that it might be a points total like that you need, so we're far from safe yet. The whole bottom half is looking over their shoulder, so we've still got work to do. [BBC Sport]

Martin Jol

On his team's fortune:

I thought we controlled the game in the first half, it was almost perfect. We kept the ball and they could not dominate us, and the crowd were getting frustrated. At Spurs we limited them and then scored, and that was our intention today, and it almost came off. We didn't score, so 0-0 would have been OK as they kept on coming at us. Compliments to Newcastle, but we should have had a bit more today. I don't think we have to look down, but it's disappointing not to get at least a point today. [Sky Sports]

On Cisse's goal:

To be fair to him, Cisse’s done that kind of thing a few times late on in games. You have to be alert and to concentrate for 95 minutes. [The Telegraph]

On the relegation battle:

There are two clubs who have a problem - Reading and QPR - so it's all about the third club. Otherwise, the results today were good for us - good for Newcastle as well. I don't think we're in trouble, but then ten years ago you needed 44 points to stay up, a couple of seasons ago a club needed 42, but then five or six seasons it's been 36 points. I think you need a lot of points this year to be safe, but I think we are fine, although you never know. At least we've a very good goal difference compared to other teams, so that is important, but of course we would like a few more wins. [ESPN FC]

Match Ratings

Player The Guardian Poll Avg
Krul 7.6 7.2 38
Simpson 6.7 6.4 13
S.Taylor 7.5 7.7 55
Yanga-Mbiwa 6.6 7.2 14
Santon 6.2 6 5
Marveaux 7.3 7.1 51
Sissoko 6.6 7.8 1
Cabaye 7 8.2 67
Jonas 7.5 8.2 80
Cisse 7.5 7.1 39
Gouffran 6.8 6.5 18
Anita 6.9 6.3 13
Shola 5.8 6.5 12
Campbell 5.6 6.1 -1

Selected Stats, etc.

Newcastle Fulham
Shots 28 8
On Target 1 0
Off Target 5 2
Blocked 9 2
Passing 353/404 353/432
Passing % 87 82
Territory % 56.1 43.9
Attacking Third 93/127 63/95
Attacking Third % 73 66
Crosses 11/42 4/12
Cross % 26 25
Take-ons 11/24 3/9
Corners 4/10 2/3
Tackles 12/20 15/21
Interceptions 7 11
Blocks 2 7
Clearances 13/24 22/45
Aerial Duels 15/34 19/34
Aerial Duels % 44 56
Fouls Committed 13 11
Yellow 2 2
Red 0 0

StatsZone had Newcastle at 56.1 territory percentage. It looks even more lopsided than that:


Newcastle hit the post three times Sunday. That's five times in the last 180+ minutes. This chalkboard shows that the first shot of the double post sequence was deflected, so in the eyes of Opta, John Arne Riise did in fact hit the ball intentionally with his arm. This would have been cause for much indignation, had Cisse not scored the game-winner.


Jonas Gutierrez was everywhere. Stats: 33/36 passing (92%, 10/11 in the attacking third), 2 chances created, 3/3 take-ons, 4/5 tackles, 2 interceptions, 4/5 clearances. The only thing he did poorly was cross the ball (1/4), and with Jonas, that just comes with the territory. Some visual representations:





This ESPN FC article mentions rumors that Cheikh M'Bengue was at St James' Park on Sunday watching the match.

New Table

Plc LW Team GP GR Pts GF GA GD ExPts PrPts PrFin
10 10 Fulham 31 7 39 43 47 -4 39.7 48 10
11 12 Southampton 32 6 37 46 53 -7 39.6 44.4 12
12 11 West Ham 31 7 37 35 44 -9 36 45.1 11
13 15 Newcastle 32 6 36 42 56 -14 35.8 42.7 13
14 14 Norwich 32 6 35 30 49 -19 30.7 40.8 14
15 13 Stoke City 32 6 34 28 39 -11 34.5 40.5 15
16 18 Aston Villa 32 6 33 35 59 -24 30 38.6 16
17 16 Sunderland 32 6 31 34 45 -11 35.9 37.7 18
18 17 Wigan 31 7 31 37 57 -20 31.2 38 17
19 19 QPR 32 6 24 29 52 -23 28.5 29.3 19
20 20 Reading 32 6 23 36 63 -27 29.2 28.5 20