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It's a tread-water kind of day around Newcastle United

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Newcastle United is that huge granite weight from your elementary school worksheets demonstrating potential energy.

Richard Heathcote/Getty Images

It's a relegation party and everyone is invited!  Today is the day that we could learn confirmation of Newcastle United's relegation from the Permier League as the Makems play their game in hand against under-fire Roberto Martinez and his floundering Everton side.  A victory would confirm yet another edition of the annual "Escape By The Skin Of Your Teeth Show" is successful and send the Toon down. A draw or an Everton victory would set up a last-day showdown in which a win by Newcastle over Tottenham paired with a loss by their rivals would be the club's only chance to stay up.

In the meantime, surprising stories (insert sarcasm font) continue to flow out of the club as Kevin Keegan has had Not Very Nice Things to say about Mike Ashley.  It's really nothing very incendiary this time around... in fact the payoff quote is really just truth and not trying to start a fight.  The pay-off quote was something like (well, exactly this):

You have to look at Mike Ashley and say he hasn’t handled the decision-making very well or he’s given the responsibility to people and they haven’t handled it very well.

--bbc.com

If you have the time, you can find corners of the internet (you can probably guess where) that this is described as Keegan SLAMming Ashley which just kind of shows us that we're all sitting here treading water at least until the final whistle of the Everton/Sunderland match at which time we'll know if our fate is decided or whether we'll have to get all worked up for the weekend.  You know which way the folks who are plugged into the ratings are hoping.

Feel free to use this as a discussion/water-tread thread if you are able to watch the match later (or if you just need a hug).